Beside You
by Fennie
Summary: Derek and Stiles Friendship Snippets to Mariana's Trench's "Beside You". Because its 1:30am and I love the song and the pairing and I dunno what I'm doing with my life. But enjoy. Not written with any romance or heavily implied Sterek, but it's there I think. Rated T just to be safe.


I love this song. And Derek and Stiles. Kinda drabbly. Some parts don't make a super ton of sense, just as a warning.

The lyrics are italicized and are property of Mariana's Trench. The song is "Beside You"

Also, I don't own Teen Wolf.

Enjoy!

* * *

_When your tears are spent on your last pretense,  
And your tired eyes refuse to close and sleep in your defense.  
When it's in your spine like you've walked for miles,  
And the only thing you want is just to be still for a while.  
_

I shouldn't be awake. I looked at my digital alarm clock, the numbers blurry when I tried to focus on them. I'm a little confused why, there's absolutely nothing wrong with my clock so why don't the numbers look right?

And then I realize it's because tears are still sitting on the brim of my eyes, not yet big enough to drop but big enough to interfere with my vision. I sigh, part of me wanting to reach up and scrub the salty water out of existence but the larger part of myself not wanting to move an inch. So I continue to sit, like I've been doing for who knows how long because I can't see what time it is at the moment.

"Why aren't you sleeping?"

I barely even start at the voice, just turn my head to see Derek slide into my room via window.

I shrug.

He looks worried but I couldn't care less, letting my eyes drop back to the edge of my bed where I've been staring for the last hour? 5 hours? Who knows.

"Stiles? You realize it's," he pauses to glance at my clock, "4:36am right? You have school tomorrow. You should be sleeping."

"Glad to know my clock's still working. Stupid tears made it look all fuzzy."

Derek looks at me, brow furrowing a little as he looks even more worried than he did a second ago.

And suddenly I can't stop the words from spilling out. "I can't stop seeing his face, hearing his voice. I can't stop replaying the lift falling on him, every time I close my eyes he's there. Crying out for help and I'm twenty feet away unable to fucking _move_! I can't even manage to finish properly calling 911 for the guy! I'm just so useless, laying there, watching him. Both of us knowing he's going to die. Horribly and painfully. And, his voice, Derek, _oh God_, his _voice!_ He was terrified, laying there helplessly, screaming for someone to save him and that someone should have been me! But it wasn't. And now all I can do is replay it. Over and over again. So I can't just sleep because I've got school tomorrow and need to go on with my life like none of this ever happened. At least, I can't tonight, not tonight." When I finish I slump in the chair even more, tears beginning to fall freely once more.

He doesn't say anything, just leads me away from the chair onto my bed and sits next to me, his arm wrapped protectively around my shoulders.

_If your heart wears thin I will hold you up  
And I will hide you when it gets too much  
I'll be right beside you  
I'll be right beside you  
_

"I don't know if I can keep doing this."

The words echoed around us. They were true. I couldn't act like it didn't bother me, being the only one without supernatural powers. It was too much for a mere human, running with these werewolves all the time.

"You don't mean that. You love every infuriatingly exciting moment of this." He answers easily, barely reacting to my confession.

"How? How do you know that? It's easy for you to say because you're _you_, Mr. Derek-Freaking-Alpha-Wolf-Hale. You're limits aren't anywhere near mine." I retort, shaking a little from a combination of anger and exhaustion, mentally, physically and emotionally drained.

He turns to finally look at me, his face serious. "I know because I know you, Mr. Stiles-ADHD-Riddled-Human-Stilinski. You're much stronger than you could ever give yourself credit for. We depend on you for your information, for your emotions, for your ability to remain level headed regardless of what the situation is. You can keep doing this because you love this pack and don't want them to get hurt if you can help it. Because you have endless amounts of energy and are deeply fascinated with the latest supernatural happenings. You'll continue to do this because any and every time you get like this and lose yourself even a bit, the pack and I will be here to steer you back in the right direction. I'll be right beside you the entire time. That's how I know it."

_When you're overwhelmed and you've lost your breath  
When the space between the things you know is blurry nonetheless.  
When you try to speak but you make no sound  
And the words you want are out of reach but they've never been so loud  
_

"I trust you!"

I wanted to scream it; wanted to make the words actually tangible so I could shove it in his face and make him believe I was being honest. After everything we'd been through, after all the times I'd obviously trusted him, trusted him enough to place my life in his hands with little fear of what the outcome would be.

And I know I shouldn't be trusting him so much; he's stupid and clumsy. He's a _human_ for God's sake! So fragile, so easy to break without even trying.

I opened my mouth to say it, those three stupid words that need to be said now more than ever.

But my throat closes up, my mouth runs dry and-and suddenly I can't breathe. So I just stand there, these words screaming and rebounding around in my head so loudly I can barely hear anything else yet I still can't vocalize them.

And before I can do anything else, he leaves.

_I will stay.  
Nobody will break you,  
Yeah._

Oh my God, he's going to die. Definitely going to die. Scott managed to get here in time and then _drop the freaking bullet_ and now he's going to die. The Wolfsbane or whatever is going to leak into his heart and he's going to die, on the floor, in front of me.

And then I don't know what I was thinking but suddenly I'm leaning over him, slapping his face a little and yelling at him.

"Derek! Hey, stay with me buddy. I'm right here, listen to my voice and come away from the light! Light is bad, my voice is good." He didn't do anything. Gulping, I pulled my hand back and balled it into a fist. "Please don't kill me!"

And I punched him and oh_ God_ did that _fucking hurt_! But hey, he's waking up and even standing; albeit a little shakily but better than being unconscious on the floor.

I take what I can get.

As he shoves the powder into the bullet hole (which is so awesomely gross) he starts spazzing out again and I instinctively grab his bicep and shoulder with hands.

"Derek! Derek! I'm here, I'm not going anywhere. You got this, you can make it through this. Nobody here is going to hurt you. I'll stay and be here when this is all over even though I should really be getting help over how morbidly fascinated I am by what's happening right now."

He scowls at me and doesn't say anything. But once all the powder is in the hole he reaches for my shoulder and grabs at it blindly until his arm finishes healing.

_Trust in me, trust in me.  
Don't pull away  
Trust in me, trust in me.  
I'm just trying to keep this together,  
Because I could do worse and you could do better  
_

It's funny how much they need me. Honestly, it is. All the Big Bad Wolves yet without one measly human they'd fall apart at every seam.

"I know I'm just a human and the pack deserves someone stronger but I'm the only one whp's keeping it together. You need me, and you know it." I know I'm pushing my luck, but hey, being the only without supernatural powers around here I think I deserve getting my ego stroked every now and then.

"Of course we do. We'd all have ripped each other's throats out by now." His voice is strained, like he's going against every fiber of his being by admitting this and, let's face it, he probably.

But the simple admission is enough to stop us from continuing fighting about whatever the hell we were fighting about.

* * *

Hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
